Monday, February 26, 2007
something beautiful gone wrong...
seasons changed.
memoirs of our fading days
won't you play my song,the one about tragic lovers
something beautiful,gone terribly wrong.
you don't matter,I pretend.
we might never have been lovers.
I tried
no solutions anywhere
look on your face
well,it made me walk away
trust me when i say,i didn't want to walk away
walking away,I never did turn
and i'll be sleepless.
i can't help but entertain
walking away,the replay
today was just diferent
this is the begining of the end
all of this for nothing
we might never have been lovers
this is the end.
posted at [11:07 PM]
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Monday, February 19, 2007
same ol' morning.
everyone's splitting up.there are no longer any factions.no cliques.no anything.
irreversible effects,defects,they're never gonna be repaired.wounds stay open,hearts lay broken.Tempers frayed.They're all mine tonight.
nothing lasts forever
err...almost nothing
not in the mood for a post,but whatever.
Cranky love songs,warm fuzzy feelings tinged with regret
recurring dreams about this shadowy serpent-like thingy entering my body,bothering me
dreams are nothing,there's no faith.
imma good role model?
managed to convince kang and yuen to quit smoking...wahaha
not letting love enter,play my cards right.Im different from all the rest..
Im gonna be at the top of the world,weird feeling that im gonna give it all away.
I never felt so right.you're my adrenaline,music.
feel up this empty void
within me.
lemme be king throughout the coming nights.
posted at [11:34 AM]
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Thursday, February 15, 2007
If Looks Could Kill
If looks could kill you'd be a murderer,
maybe just a whore, maybe you're a..
If looks could kill you'd be a murderer,
maybe just a whore..
maybe just a whore
If looks could kill you'd be a murderer,
maybe just a whore,
I promised so much more,
walking through that door became a chore,
if looks could kill,
if looks could kill.
I'm sorry for, I'm sorry for, I'm sorry for,
bleeding on your porch.
I know I know I know,
knew that it wasn't right,
but of course I tried
to keep my heart inside of my
chest but that fell through
that's why I'm here with her not you
If looks could kill you'd be a murderer,
maybe just a whore,
I promised so much more,
walking through that door became a chore,
(if looks could kill)
if looks could kill you'd be a murderer,
(if looks could kill)
maybe just a whore,
I promised so much more,
walking through that door became a chore.
It's a comfort to know
that you're watching them
go,
watch your living scream
you're name
is this what you wanted
is this what you needed
is this what you call our bleeding kids
take a run for me, leave them all alone
see their eyes when their love's so far from home
with a flick of the tongue
and the shake in the hips
and the look in your eye
and their ready to lose/and the red in your lips (not sure lol)
If looks could kill you'd be a murderer,
maybe just a whore,
I promised so much more,
walking through that door became a chore,
if looks could kill
if looks could kill
if looks could kill
I'm sorry for, I'm sorry for, I'm sorry for
bleeding on your porch
I know I know I know
knew that it wasn't right
but of course I tried
to keep my love inside of my
chest but that fell through
well that's why that's why I'm here with you
here with you
If looks could kill you'd be a murderer,
maybe just a whore
If looks could kill
if looks could, if looks could
you'd be a whore
If looks could kill you'd be a murderer,
maybe just a whore,
I promised so much more,
walking through that door became a chore,
if looks could kill
if looks could kill
If looks could kill you'd be a murderer,
maybe just a whore,
maybe I'm the
maybe I'm the murderer
maybe you're the whore
If looks could kill
if looks could, if looks could kill
you'd be a murderer
If looks could kill
you'd be a murderer
PS:This is the only 'A Heartwell Ending' song i listen to.its rare.their songs are really hard to find.I know that most of the people here won't like em.but its okay.I finally found the lyrics to this song.I don't really like em.but some of you might like em.they remind me of 'The Starting Line' with more angst.
If U want It.Msg me. =)
posted at [12:03 AM]
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Tuesday, February 13, 2007
dear bloggy
v-day's tomorrow...
my existence been acknowledged?i guess
how time flies
i'm gonna be 18 in 2mths exactly
this isn't just goodbye
the past 17yrs10mths wasn't exactly easy for me,but im coping well enough..
this desperation?
an endless struggle to survive,ive played around too much.
the way i've been brought up,sometimes it makes me wonder whether im overly-matured or anything.I feel like im jaded at times.
nothing comes free,Its not your fault.
im welcomed to return to npcc now,pondering whether I should return,don't know how'd we'd face each other if we ever met.We'd most likely just walk past each other.We burnt down something beautiful.
heard that you've been studying real hard,im happy for you.. =)
I know you won't believe even if you knew,Ive stopped smoking and everything.
Finally,I can say that i've kept my side of our promise after months of being lost
wondering if i'd be able to enter the courses i want..
a step forward is better than not moving at all.
bless you and everyone else =)
im one of the thousand faces you've choosen to ignore.but its okay.you used to listen to me cry.Relief is all in my head,im harmless.
haha.are shops open on the mon or tuesday following cny?
lol.i can look and be real matured,if needed.wait till the grads see me in my combined outfit.im not a fake,believe it or not.
c'mon babe.let me enter...NGEE ANN POLY!!!.
i need a shot at redemption.
HOPE MY PRAYERS Are ANSWERED,ones for my friends,you and me.
posted at [10:46 PM]
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Monday, February 12, 2007
finger in my throat,down in the pits of my stomache,thats what this arguement feels like..
ahh...
im soooooo surprised to see my nick in someone else's blog
asking me to take care. --->Awkward,yeah.
dw about me
cos I'm real fine =)
weird,im listed as v.gd in that blog.. crazy person .
little black dog(police kinda) on a leash almst bit me when i was below my block,minding my own business.
played bball,we're no longer the same...
stupid rat ran into my path,i avoided it.It WAS real fast =x
something i saw on msn:
++Single++ ++valentineday free++
self-promotion?got me laughing..
its 1205am now.1more day to v-day =)
feeling so lonely,not cos of v-day.BODOH!!!im not celebrating it this year.WASTEOFTIME.Purpose-less.
I know im not good-looking or even average,but if going on dates and stuff mean anything,I could get one on v-day if i tried.BEATS the purpose tho`.
im more than nothing...
did you think you persuaded me to let you go?
Good Morning peeps,its 12:15am.Im ur friend,FY...
Happy V-day in advance,let the hearts collide. <33
lovers interwined
perfumed bodies,dancing 'to' and 'fro'
basking under the moonlight
time halted to a stop,frozen at the moment
our eyes connected
nothing else matters anymore...
together we'll fly away and im wishing you were here
PS:its a habit of mine to like leave something bad at the end.lol.Remove the last line and there will be a happy ending..1 sentence,a couple of words make the whole difference in the world.See (o_O )!!
posted at [11:51 PM]
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Sunday, February 11, 2007
WENT TO BUGIS WITH IDZWAN!!!
BOUGHT AFEW stuff...
After CNY,I want go image 2001 buy more clothes....
this funny lady at PS thought i was like working in a shop and went:
what is the smallest size jeans for boys?
got me stunned...idzwan told her im not working there.
PERVERT saleslady at Far East Plaza...almst pulled aside the screen..while I was changing.. PERVERT!!!
FOUND 40 bucks,gave 20 to idzwan
went to cut my hair,my fringe is gone T_T
now look like secondary school cept still got abit of sideburn...haiz
posted at [7:29 PM]
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Monday, February 05, 2007
omg..
i feel fcuking alive..its a weird feeling but I like it.
im hopeful and POSITIVE of my results..
this feeling that Id score.
the assurance that im alive,finally its gonna be out.
im sick of waiting.
i know it means nothing much to anyone else...but i threw everything away for this.FCUK!!
fought back tears,mind and the sense of empty-ness to go through the papers
after all ive put in.i know im gonna pass.somehow
how should i describe this current feeling?
like ive got everything i ever wanted in life?the girl,the cash,friends,family...everything.
like im top dog in the world.
fcuking swear that i can take on a 7-foot enemy now..with my bare hands and tear him/her/it apart.
endorphin?nah.I've not been exercising or out in the sun or smoking or eating chocs.
I don't do drugs EVER.
reminds me of my first kiss,the first cut,the first leap...i feel alive
today im king,tomorrow will see.embrace me..
if anyone sees me now...they'd think im nuts..but i feel REAL good.
if only i could talk to you now but i can't..it'll be my best day on Earth.
im half-smiling now,100 thank yous to you my ex.the impact you've had.
everything i wrote.
you made me feel alive,you always amazed me..ALWAYS!!
this change in me,you won't ever get to see.
As I pray,heaven hold you close.
I'll be alright here.thank you!!!
you're not here with me now
all the best to you too... =)
self-reliant,I feel like a king today.this post is not about broken hearts,its about me.
posted at [10:53 PM]
Gave It Away
Nice day =) today,perfect even..
thoughts occupy my head,dancing around in the grey mater we call brain
wondering if you've changed,.you're not here with me
change is inevitable,have I changed?
suppress my thoughts,crazy ones in my head,totally uncalled for.
At times we all feel that the whole world's in our clutches,how many would give it away?
I did.unwillingly
Dreams remain as dreams,living in BLACK and WHITE.
I know what I want in this cold,uncaring world that we live in.
everyone seems to fend for themselves only,oblivious to the world around them
Pathetic 17 years of existence,everything's replaying itself
playback movie of sorts,we keep making the same mistakes
feels as if im moving in circles,there's noone to lead me
hope/faith's nothing.
what's there to believe in,when we keep falling
PS: In the end,we're all on our own.struggling for existence.
dreams are not reality,chances are they'll never be..
now tell me,have I changed?
1 day we're at the top,the next we're in the pits
posted at [3:29 PM]
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Sunday, February 04, 2007
hmm
tomorrow's leon's bday ===>18th
seems like an eternity,like we've known each other for life
tho~ its only been like 5,6yrs odd at most.
booze demon,he might've become.
Swallow me alive
I feel alive,more than ever..relating with every hate,hurt,pain and lastly life.
absorbing the essence,manipulating it into my brain
allowing it to enter,leaving is hard.
the protective coat from within,music is my life
swallowing me ever-slowly,you're my everything..
pray for you,i'll be alright =)
posted at [11:59 AM]
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Saturday, February 03, 2007
i'm so addicted.. xXcrossoutmy<33heartxx
love and breakups are damn addictive.many2x better than bodysurfs,smoking,blood and all the crazy shit.jumping around.Moshing madness.
just a fool for you,... eh when get results?
Sick & tired of waiting.
Im kinda lost lately,hectic life..
hmm.im not troubled by relationship issues at the moment.its all over
think I screwed my hand..sad2
the last sunrise,chose the white path,im not turning back..
my heart's full of black.
PS:yewsheng's fringe now longer than mine,I know I don't cut.. hmm.nxt mth or few mre wks...go cut again. every1's changing,the world's changing.
me?paint it black and white and line it with pink ribbons.
the colour of innocence.
the sake of the childrens..
ever-smiling so pure..
**abstract from yesterday:
the casual glance shot through me
naked feeling,feel of vulnerability
smiling half-heartedly,I shrugged it off.
you,aren't you my enemy?
that pity look,makes me feel alive
guilt's eating into you,doesn't matter anyway
I never mattered anyway
closed my eyes,I looked away.
there's no sense in regret,everything you put me through
my heart's not beating..
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...aitez.this thingy I wrote..not cos of badblood or anything.
firstly,its not cos of my ex or anything.
Its more about the double-header(from the old posts i've long deleted)
looked at me like she cared,when she's actually been badmouthing me. yeah.the girl who like..i dunno in what way i offend lar.THAT 1.
its all over,Im not angry or anything.
sucker who judges people from their looks.
even if she said sorry now,it would'nt matter anyway.
apologies I'd accept but they wouldn't change my life in any way.
my goodbyes: other day,i intro you all songs or something over msn.. time to sleep or something =)
posted at [4:16 PM]
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